Addiction - Learning To Live Again

About a year ago I walked away from alcohol and cigarettes, after engaging in both practices for more than 15 years. Was I addicted to drinking and smoking? I would have to say that I was, seeing as how I did both things everyday. I would have to say that, on average, for the last ten of the fifteen total years I drank a twelve pack of beer and smoked a pack of cigarettes a day. I was obviously addicted to both practices because now that I'm done with them I feel as if I were walking around in a haze for those 10 years. It's a strange feeling, to be sure, and in many ways I feel as if I must learn to live again. So what happened to make me change my life? Did the courts make me? Did a wife or lover make me? Did a parent make me? Did I hit "rock bottom" in some way? Nope, none of these things happened. The thing that happened was my daughter coming into this world. She is my only child, and I simply couldn't see being a bad example for her. That's it. I couldn't see myself telling her not to smoke, while I choked down a cigarette. And I couldn't see telling her the dangers of drinking, when Dad went out and had drinks with his buddies. I simply didn't want to be a bad example, so I stopped doing both things. Besides, I really was tired of both practices. I mean neither one had gotten me anywhere that could be considered "good". Now I'm clean and sober, loving every minute of it, and learning to live again. It's funny, because when I walked away from drinking and smoking I no longer wanted to hang out with people who are doing those things. I can tolerate it for an hour or so, but then I just want to be away from it. This was an interesting transition for me, because I didn't know what to do if I wasn't drinking or taking a cigarette break every hour or so. It's amazing how you can get caught up in something to such a degree, that it seems "normal". Having a drink after work or hanging out with people and drinking had become normal to me. Almost as if it were a hobby, albeit a very self destructive hobby. The bottom line is that learning to live again can be a bit of a challenge, especially in the beginning, because the drinking and smoking can really become things that feel so normal. This is probably the reason individuals attend groups to help them with this transition, a path which I chose not to take. In all seriousness, learning to live again is a fun and challenging process and I wouldn't trade it for a twelve pack and a pack of lung darts if you offered me all the money in the world. I think George Bernard Shaw said it best when he said, "Miracles, in the sense of phenomena we cannot explain, surround us on every hand: life itself is the miracle of miracles."